A vitreous learning cycle is one in which we polish our rough edges.

When applied to developing our people skills  this vitreous cycle

produces resilient  individuals and relationships.

vit·re·ous  [vi-tree-uhs] adjective: of the nature of or resembling glass, as in transparency,  brittleness, hardness, glossiness, etc.: vitreous china.

Synonyms: clear, glasslike, hyaline, hyaloid, translucent, transparent, burnished, clear, glazed, glazy, glossy,  icy, lustrous, shiny, sleek, slick

Knowing  who you are points the way

Self-knowledge  is  honestly answering the question,  What you are like?  Knowing what interests you, what your strengths are and what you are not satisfied with helps you adjust your personal compass and set objectives that are in keeping with who you are.

Just do it

People skills are not rocket science.   The best place to polish your people skills is in the real world.  Challenge yourself to step outside of your comfort zone.     Developing any skill involves practicing it.  Someone  who is skilled in the social graces, meets every situation with poise,  good manners, and elegance.

We learn social skills reflexively

Reflexive learning is navigating the circular relationships between cause and effect in rapidly changing circumstances. In this  context  it refers to the capacity of an individual to recognize the forces of socialization.  It is a quantum reflection and you, as the observer, are part of the equation.

Interpersonal soft skills are significant in their ability to build relationships forged on trust. Honest communication, mutual respect, even where there are differences of world view or personal opinion, integrity and ethical behaviour, contribute to underpinning the trust factor. Trust is required in constructing healthy communities and organisations, and when it upheld, has been seen to unleash creativity, engender empowerment, optimise teamwork. Fostering a culture of trust, therefore, rewards communities and organizations that hold true to the principles as a highly valuable intangible asset. Both Jack Welch and Warren Bennis maintain it as a key component to business succcess and yet few companies or institutions seem to manage in enfranchise trust sustainably because of a failure to transmit it as a cultural norm.

The characteristics of trustworthiness include integrity, reliability, fairness, caring, openness, reciprocality and, within appropriate caveats that does not transgress a core value set, loyalty. Organizations and institutional policies might promote a culture of trust by promoting open communication, by modeling behaving in socially responsible and ethical ways to every employee.

According to Charles Green, creator of the Trust Equation, ‘the way we use the Trust Creation Process model is really just outcomes of the principles we hold.’ What I understand Charles to impute, it that who we are and what values we hold to be true, informs how we engage and behave with others across the board.

Green maintains that the only way to become trusted is to act consistently from a set of core principles and the four specific principles governing trustworthy behavior that he cites are:

1) A focus on the Other (client, customer, internal co-worker, boss, partner, subordinate) for the Other’s sake, not just as a means to one’s own ends.

We often hear “client-focus,” or “customer-centric.” But these are terms all-too-often framed in terms of economic benefit to the person trying to be trusted.

2) A collaborative approach to relationships.

Collaboration here means a willingness to work together, creating both joint goals and joint approaches to getting there.

3) A medium to long term relationship perspective, not a short-term transactional focus.

Focus on relationships nurtures transactions; but focus on transactions chokes off relationships. The most profitable relationships for both parties are those where multiple transactions over time are assumed in the approach to each transaction.

4) A habit of being transparent in all one’s dealings.

Transparency has the great virtue of helping recall who said what to whom. It also increases credibility, and lowers self-orientation, by its willingness to keep no secrets.

According to Green, applying these principles to all of our actions will develop the fullest potential of trust that bonds and binds relationships, and thereby, builds longevity and reward born from such a strong tie.

As this erudite research on trust reveals, ‘Trust has several beneficial effects. It helps build teams, where trust acts as a bond of tying people together. It reduces energy otherwise required for controls. It helps in cases of conflict. Overall, it reduces task complexity.’

The benefits trust rewards us with professionally, socially and personally, are worthy of our time, attention and investment to explore, accomodate and demonstrate. Make no mistake. your ‘relationship capital’ is being accounted for with every interaction, so it is a wise person that conducts themselves with every meritricious endeavour of creating relationships bound and bonded in trust.

Sociocultural evolution(ism) is an umbrella term for theories of cultural evolution and social evolution, describing how cultures and societies have developed over time. Although such theories typically provide models for understanding the relationship between technologies, social structure, the values of a society, and how and why they change with time, they vary as to the extent to which they describe specific mechanisms of variation and social change.

Today we are not only witnessing, but actively and consciously driving a new e evolution as we migrate to various community portals on the web and develop new behaviours in communicating. The ramifications of these different methods of interacting are driving significant cultural memes to emerge, new lexicons and radically different styles of engaging. The simplest evidence is, of course, the email. ‘But I sent you an email’ my 86 year old mother will complain, (she is on Facebook too). New technologies work for everyone who can afford the devices or access to them. They are ciritcal components of most any job. Not to understand the purpose and practice of ‘blogging’ will practically render you luddite: